On Empathy

What does it mean to be empathic? How can we use this way of being with others to resolve conflict and promote understanding whilst at the same time keeping ourselves emotionally safe? If too much or not enough empathy is a problem for us, how might counselling and psychotherapy help?

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How (Not) To Talk To A Person In Distress

At various times in our lives we will be faced with deciding how best to support family, friends, colleagues – and sometimes strangers – who are in distress. Perhaps we have a friend who has been bereaved or a family member dealing with a serious health problem. How to be…

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Mind The Gap: Communication In Relationship

Many couples struggle to find a way to communicate effectively. Without a solid platform from which to discuss tricky subjects safely and productively we may flounder around feeling unhappy, angry and stuck. There might be rows, silences and slammed doors but no matter how much energy is expended nothing changes;…

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Black And White Thinking

Could black and white thinking be hindering you from making friends, forging a career or finding a life partner? Many of us can get stuck in an old pattern of behaviour where a relationship or situation is seen as either all good or all bad and something that starts well…

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Why Do People Leave Me?

A common problem brought to therapy is bewilderment as to why friends and potential romantic partners repeatedly leave us. Often, there is a clear pattern of new relationships going well for a time and then we suddenly get a sense of having been dropped. How can psychotherapy and counselling help?

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Only The Lonely

We all have times in our lives when we are lonely. Feeling cut off from the support and companionship of others can be a huge source of stress. In my experience of helping people combat anxiety and depression, prolonged periods of loneliness not only contribute to poor mental health but…

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When ‘No’ Means ‘Maybe’

As human beings we all have needs and wants (for love, attention and so on) and have likely worked out a strategy for the best way to have these needs met. Sometimes, a strategy that worked tolerably well in the past begins to work against us and we are left…

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How To Say Sorry

Acknowledging that our behavior has hurt someone’s feelings and taking responsibility for our own part in a situation can be a very powerful way of healing rifts, cementing relationships and preventing resentment from building up. What might we aim for when saying sorry?

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To Put It Another Way…

As human beings we are hard-wired to make sense of what happens to us. This is an important skill since good judgement about the world gives rise to emotional and physical safety. Sometimes, however, we might be continuing to interpret our current experiences based on skewed or narrow unconscious assumptions…

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